Part 38: Episode XXXII: Place My Blame

Welp I guess that whole monster invasion cut the awards ceremony short. They weren’t just too lazy to animate an extra scene for winning the tournament cup. That would be silly. This is Square we’re talking about. Paragons of polish and effort into game develo—



…Oh. No this is not an invitation to defend Final Fantasy X-2’s maiden honor! I swear to god I will lock this thread SO fast!



"Shouldn't you heal up first?"
”Or at least wait until morning? It’s going to be dark out in like two hours… One night can’t hu—”
"Yuna needs me with her now. I can't be lying around in some bed."
*slouches* "Yeah, but..."
"Come on, look sharp! The blitz season just started! Don't make those faces, ya?”



Wakka hands over the tournament trophy to the Aurochs who proceed to deposit it in the nearest broom closet as the thing is never seen again. But hey, enjoy this three second animation. It and Wakka just standing around with the trophy in this scene are literally the only in-game acknowledgement that the player managed to win the tournament. Should we have lost, Wakka would just be in his usual Neanderthal slouch with no massive phallic symbol of victory.



“Well... See you, boys! You be good!"
”…Foreground dog. You too.”
“Cap'n..."
"I can't hear you!"
"Cap'n!"
”That’s better. Oh… By the way, I forgot to mention… With me retiring I gave the newbie full GM rights along with the ability to trade or terminate any of your contracts as he sees fit this season.”
“…..”
“Well… See ya.”

And thus the Besaid Aurochs’ significance to our story comes to its end. They’ll still be around for optional blitzball. But otherwise it is back to the Aurochs’ locker room sausagefest for the remainder of the game. Such is the life of a blitzball NPC…

Some time later Wakka rejoins with Team AWOL. Big help back during the stadium, guys…



"Are you sure?"
"Never liked long goodbyes anyway. Sorry for making you wait, Yuna. I had some promises to keep, ya? From now on, I'll be your full-time guardian."
"Then welcome back, Sir Wakka.”



"Hey, it's good to be back, ya?”
<He busy one afternoon and they treat it like big reunion when he come back. Kimahri been guardian all day every day for Lady Yuna for decade and nobody say boo. Typical…>



*shakes head* "Not really. We don't know where the fiends came from. Maester Mika is safe, thanks to Maester Seymour. That's about it."



Yep. Just a random army of monsters crawling out of the woodwork during the biggest event in all of Spira and a stunning chance for Seymour to be a big damn hero with his exclusive Satan spawn summon. Yeah… I see no reason to investigate any of that further. Just one of those weird coincidences. You know how it is at these games.

Meanwhile on the other side of Luca…



”Gettin' swallowed by Sin! Not being able to go back to Zanarkand -- everything, EVERYTHING! I'm telling you, it's all your fault!"
”…”
“…”
“…”
“…”
“…You done?”
“…Y-Yeah… For now!”



Auron proceeds to just laugh his ass off in Tidus’ face following our hero’s little outburst. I’m not talking just a dismissive chuckle. It’s a full blown belly laugh lasting so long that the scene fades to black before it concludes.

Auron is the best character.

Several minutes of manly cackling in response to angst later…



“You knew my old man, didn't you?"
"Yeah."
"And you also knew Yuna's father."
"That's correct."
"Hey, man, there's no way! That's just impossible!"
"Nothing impossible about it.”


New Music: Auron’s Theme (Recommended Listening)



“Then I went to Zanarkand...where I watched over you. So that one day I could bring you to Spira."
”…So what? You’re like a time cop?”
“…A what?”
“Everyone says Zanarkand got destroyed a 1000 years ago. But we were there like last week! How could you have defeated Sin ten years ago and then gone back in time to my Zanarkand and then back to Spira unless you’re some sort of time cop?”
“…Is that how you think it works…? Hehe…”
“I swear if you start laughing again…”
“…Heh. Fine… It is… complicated…”



"Why did it have to be me?"
"Jecht asked me to."
"Is he alive?"


“He is no longer human. But then... I felt something of Jecht there in that shell, couldn't you? You must have felt him when you came in contact with Sin."



DRAMA FLASH!




Wandering Flame





"No! That's ridiculous! No way! I don't believe you!"
”No… No! That’s not true… That’s impossible!”
“Search your feelings. You know it to be true.”
“…Did we just do Star Wars…?! Is that even a THING in Spira?!”
“Nope.”
“Argh!”
"But it is the truth. You'll see for yourself. Come with me."
"If I say no?"



"I don't care about your stories!"
”…Yeah yeah. I get the irony… Is it irony? Whatever. Shut up!”
"I see. Sorry you feel that way. Fine, then. Come or don't come. It's your decision."
”I’m sure ‘…and then he wasted away in some crap blitzball team’ will make a very compelling next chapter of your life.”



“You tell me it's my decision... But I don't have a choice, do I? You're the only one who can tell me what's going on, anyways!”
”And I get the feeling I am just about out of answers from you in this conversation, right?!”
“Pretty much.”



"Irritating, I know. Or are you afraid?”
”Let’s just put me down for generally emotional in the very bad day sorta way. This has been the worst blitz victory postgame celebration EVER!”



"Auron? Will I ever go home? Back to Zanarkand?"
"That's up to Jecht.”
”You really like those evasive answers, huh?”
*glares*
“…” *frown*



The worst scene in the game beckons…






Episode 32 Highlight Reel




Auron Portrait – …Man I have LPed a LOT of games with dudes missing an eye…